Bittersweet

It’s late, and I know I should be in bed. But I’m enjoying the quiet that comes when hubby’s at work and daughter’s in bed. It’s so quiet that I can hear every creak and groan of our old house.

I’m beat. I’ve been teaching classes as a second job for the past nine months. One evening a week for four hours, I left my full-time job and head to class. It’s draining. Because my students are adults, I expected them to be self-sufficient. It was quite the opposite; many of them were starting second careers or had never been to college at all. It ended up taking more time that I thought.
I’ve had some adventures. There was the guy who paced the whole class, the group who routinely showed up late, and the woman who couldn’t understand why she didn’t get credit for an in-class project we did the day she was absent. She argued me down for those points. She didn’t get them.
Tonight was my last class for the rest of the year. My full-time schedule is about to go into overdrive, and there is no way I can keep up both jobs.
I should be jumping for joy.
Instead, I’m surprised by my reaction. I will actually miss teaching. There was something about connecting with people and sharing knowledge that was fulfilling. I learned as much as they did.
But for now, I think I’ll just appreciate the break.
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16 thoughts on “Bittersweet

  1. I can't imagine what it is like to teach adults. Especially ones like my father when he went back. One of his teachers called him an ass for arguing something in his class. Maybe this is why my dad quit taking classes?I hope you enjoy your break and the telling the funny stories from your classes. 🙂

  2. Wow! you seem to be juggling a lot of stuff. Good to see that you know when to stop. This is my first time here and I'm going to take look around.I'm visiting from SITS, sorry I missed your SITS day.

  3. Found your blog by way of Clean Shavings (Barn Maven). How I can relate to the dichotomous feelings you have. I have been working 2 jobs since January, now have decided to give up one of them and go full time with the other. The one I'm giving up I've been at for 10 years. It's really, really hard to let go of something that's like a child you've reared . . . but I know it's the right thing for now.

  4. I know just how you feel. I taught at the local university for a couple years right after grad school. I was working a full-time job during the day, and the classes were two nights a week really late in the evenings. I was so exhausted all the time, and I didn't have kids like you do. I don't know how you fit that all in. But like you, I missed teaching when I gave it up. I still miss it sometimes, but I think I like sleeping a little more

  5. I can imagine! I sometimes think about going back to school. But then I think of how LONG it's been since I had to do any kind of report. Definitly out of practice compared to someone that would be straight out of high school.

  6. I think I sort of know what you mean… it does sometimes feel pretty bad to leave something even when we know we cannot juggle so many things together. Here's wishing you a less stressful rest of the year… 🙂

  7. Take a deep breath and let it go. I hate letting things go sometimes too but yesterday when I was thinking about all I had to do this weekend, I was REALLY glad I no longer had a 4 hour time commitment every Saturday.

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